I can’t even get it up properly

I’ve always had problems in getting erections… But a few years ago, something bad happened and since that, I wasn’t able to get fully hard anymore. My dicklette does grow when I get turned on but it just doesn’t get stiff at all… Even when I masturbate with my thumb and index finger until I cum, my dicklette just won’t get hard at all… instead it just dribbles out my juices while being limp. I am such a limp, small dick loser and I need to get exposed for that!